Sattelies

I have: a cell phone, 3 email addresses, a web log (I really really dislike the word "blog"), a mailbox, facebook, myspace (even though I'm not really a fan), instant messaging (though I never use it) and a car. In terms of socializing, I'm equipped.

Each person wants to believe that others find them interesting, funny, attractive and will therefore be wanted. I'm not saying I'm not one of them. I'm their patron saint. It seems that social interaction is departing from involvement with the world but more a ploy to make the world want to be involved with oneself. If a complete stranger or a person I mentally deem 'creepy' asked for my email or my cell phone number, I'd be reticent. If a famous comedian asked for either, I'd supply them posthaste (as well as my IM, facebook, myspace and blood type). While I understand there is a social hierarchy, there is no need to create a class system of interaction. When did we become so open to being closed?

My best friend, Michelle, and I talked about this a couple of years ago. I told her it was frustrating to have friends that are far away, and it seems others are not willing to create new friendships once they believe they have what they want. I expressed it as a matter of having people interested in sharing their world with you as well as being interested in hearing about your world. She put it a better way, she said that a friendship is when both people leave their own arenas and build a new world together, sharing and compromising and loving.

Our implements of technology, the present-day tools of "communication", seem more like sattelites circling our own globes, waiting for transmission and protecting our selfish world from being hurt or feeling vulnerable. Rather than allowing us to build together more freely, they permit excuses as to why relationships aren't built. "Why didn't YOU call ME?", we cry. "You could have just looked at my facebook profile!" While we open ourselves for examination, it is a carefully sculpted persona, one that we believe others will desire. When what is truly desirable (and vital!) is that ever-so-frightening exposure of our faults, our indescretions. We bury ourselves deeper and deeper into this persona; in order to attract others, we work to hide ourselves. Doesn't the street go both ways? For me to know you, I must show you myself. Myself when I am real: the bad jokes and the fears and the insecurity.


Even though it sometimes hurts,
a life of truth beats a veil of farce.